Day 10 Friday

Beautiful day here this morning, 30C and not too humid. Started cooking my week 2 menu this morning. First up was the Frank Camorra slow cooked beef cheeks in one litre of Perdo Ximinez and shiraz. At five hours at 140C they are not quite done. Beef cheeks go as hard as a rock, then just collapse. I can smell them as I type.

One thing restricted movement has done has been the sourcing of funny stories and cartoons/videos. I got this one this morning from a friend.

A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young female student nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.

"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."

He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other. She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very, closely. 

"Are - my - test - results - back?"

Queensland now leads the way in confusing confinement rules. The Premier has now confirmed having a couple of visitors over is fine and you can also freely visit your partner or close friend. A bit different to Scomo’s version.

Ms Palaszczuk admits there’s a whole range of different variations, but is urging families to use common sense. Yeah right. That’s worked well so far!

“This is complex because no family is exactly the same, we all have different family living arrangements and we also know that we don’t want people to be totally socially isolated and they need to have some contact with people.

The Premier said some of the rules are pretty clear – no house parties, no large dinner parties and no mass barbecues.

“The people in your house should be the people in your house, but if there is one or two extra people that come into you house, that is not going to be breaching the law.

“So that might mean you have two adult children who want to come and visit you, well we think we should be flexible.”

The Premier said it was about being sensible and practical.

 “But we need to be shrinking our world, it means we don’t want to have a lot of extra contacts.”

 Clear as mud. This nonsense followed the botched border closure, mixed messages of school closures, backflips on weapons armourers and flipflopping on recreational boating.

Yesterday’s quiz answer: Kakadu Plum

Today’s question: What’s parse mean?